Fasting

Time for a bit of transparency.

Yesterday, I was scrolling through Instagram and I came across a friend's account that had a great effect on me. It wasn't their fault. I don't blame them in the least. If anything, it represented a place in life I found myself , by which I don't plan to stay. The post was of their family standing on an empty lot where their new house will be built. That pissed me off! The child in me thought, I went to school for seven years only to work somewhere my degree isn't honored and they didn't seek higher education, yet their home is under construction from the foundation up. My head dropped and so did my heart. Feeling that way wasn't good for me or my soul. Acknowledging my problem was far better than blaming someone else for being blessed. I've been listening to this sermon by Dr. Myles Monroe titled " You Need Be Discipline To Achieve Your Vision" (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o5uUgbcK5KU). It has really been opening my eyes. My focus is off and what better way to fix that than to get rid of distractions. Fasting from social media is my first step.

They say it takes 21 days to break/begin a habit. Fasting from social media for three weeks will cause me to focus on that which feeds my life opposed to take away from it. I found myself involved in conversations that didn't require my input, nor did it feed my personal ambition. Anger was brewing at my finger tips as I responded to someone's post or comment about how right they feel. My energy deserved a better outlet. Last night, I was reading an electronic comic book and it caused my imagination to work unlike before. There were no videos and photos causing me to think of things that would manipulate my emotions. I was surprised at every page turn, wanting more as each character played their role in the overall plot. Recording for my latest podcast episode allowed me to speak on something that excites my inner child (tune in for episode 89 of The Glory in Our Stories this Saturday on all major streaming platforms). Surrounding my desk are collectibles and wall decor of DC/Marvel characters, such as General Zod, Black Panther, Wolverine, Cyclops  (X-Men), Thor, and even a small version of Nintendo's Mario. This nook gets me aligned with that which reminds me of who I am.

My prayers in the morning have not been intentional. I find myself rushing to put my seat-belt on while simultaneously asking God to watch over my father, wife, and my coworkers. Listening to God has been one of my weaknesses, for if I did that more, I wouldn't have to worry about an interference slipping through the cracks. Are you a good husband, is what I would ask myself as I take our dog out to use the bathroom. I would scroll through my phone, head down in a 45 degree angle, not paying attention to life happening as the lake ripples with ducks swimming and the sun goes down behind the trees. My brother and I haven't ran together in about a few weeks. He's about to start back working full time and I'm not sure when we'll get that chance again. I want to lose weight and get into better shape, run 5 miles at some point without stopping, and look better than I did when I was 25-years-old. This is all achievable...if I take the time to focus.

My fast started yesterday. Though I use social medial to promote my podcast, I won't be doing so for the next few weeks. I will post episode 90, for I promised to do so with my next interviewee. Taking time to read more, write more, and live more is my goal for the next three weeks. I'll be turning 35 next month and I wish not to carry this same mindset into the rest of my life. The passing of  Chadwick Boseman, yet again, reminded me of how swift time can be (like sand falling through your fingers). I want God to say, well done, my good and faithful servant, whether I'm 36 or 63. I want to look good in my button up shirts and feel healthy while doing so. I want to  be better, do better. This is step one to that process. God has my attention. He knew exactly what it would take to be rid of the wall between me now and who I'm destined to be.