Bold Statement
I want to have sex with my wife. Sounds a little too transparent, huh? Hear me out before your mind goes left field (which happens to be the position I played during my years in little league baseball). Let me start off by saying that I am not married...yet. I'm looking towards marriage in many ways, yet not specifically for this. Time and experience has declared that I have not fully enjoyed the satisfactions of this concept in its fullness because of limitations. There's difficulty in finding pure pleasure in perpetual pain. There may be an exception when it comes to working out or giving birth, but traditionally, you give birth in a hospital and you work out in a gym. Both places provide an environment that accommodates your needs. When it comes to sex, marriage provides the same services and I needed that back in my twenties.
Having sex can be fun and fruitful, but not in a desolate place. When you're young with no thorough knowledge of anything, you do either two things: you assume or assimilate. I did both! My mom didn't really discuss sex with us for obvious reasons (embarrassment), so my sisters and I had to learn on our own. My friends were sexually active before I was back in high school, so what I knew, I learned from them. I was highly active in church up until I turned 18, so everything in relation to the sanctification of the idea was already ingrained in my spirit. Though I was curious as to what the experience entailed, there was great hesitance towards partaking of what appeared to be the forbidden act. It wasn't until college that I decided to give up my virginity. The validity of my choice was based on the assumption that I'll be marrying my girlfriend at the time. All was fun until guilt became fruitful, spilling over into all parts of my life. We almost had a baby, but because we weren't practicing in the protective surroundings of marital bliss, everything crumbled. Our child was aborted and so was our relationship. That was just enough to cause me to back away and gather a more concise perspective on the matter. My responsibilities evolved... and so did I.
When you're watching porn (it's okay to admit that you do because it's a reality most of us are ashamed of confronting), you may feel a great sense of excitement with a soft, guilty undertone. We overshadow that with justification. You say, I'm not mimicking anything these people do or I don't personally promote human sex-trafficking, but by not saying no, you're saying yes. I struggle with this as well, for I have seasons when I have perfect restraint, but others when I fall hard and stay there for a while. Now that I'm getting married, this problem has the potential to leak into the life of my wife-to-be , my kids, and a third party (which is the last thing one wants to happen). Fellas, if you think hard about your sexual appetite, you really want to have sex with your wife because that encompasses everything you will ever want and need. She will be your euphoria , your box of ecstasy beautified for you alone. She will encourage your success when failures are plenty. She will walk with you into a furnace of social dislike, aware of your heart's true intent. She will mother your legacy, bringing them up in a way that reflects love's best nature. She will be everything she was made to be...for you.
So yes, I want to have sex with my wife. Not a girl in college who slips over occasionally and cares less about my spiritual, well-being. Not someone I meet at a club who's Instagram life is more appealing than the one she actually lives. No side-chick, no eye-candy. I want her. I want she, created for me so that we both can glorify God through our obedience. There's joy in living according to His will. This was available over ten years ago, but I wasn't ready to receive it, so I did things upon my own accord. This topic reminds me of my lactose intolerance. Drinking whole-milk and eating ice-cream from Cold Stone was a piece of cake for me...literally. Eventually, my body didn't have tolerance for it, so it struggled to digest it. Now days, I have to take lactose pills in order to enjoy a few spoons of Ben and Jerry's. The awareness of the consequences makes the difference because I'm acting accordantly. I can still indulge in the goodness of dairy products, but only under the supervision of a supplement that prevents disastrous side effects. Considering sex, I rather be protected by God's covenant than to run into a convenient store, looking for plan A (condom) and plan B (a pill).
One day, I'll be in a position to receive sex in it's entirety. There will be no worries towards unwanted pregnancies or carrying guilt around my neck everyday. I will be satisfied. My fiancé and I will continue to grow with each other, into each other, fusing hearts, souls, and bodies. This will be the best wedding gift of them all.
Having sex can be fun and fruitful, but not in a desolate place. When you're young with no thorough knowledge of anything, you do either two things: you assume or assimilate. I did both! My mom didn't really discuss sex with us for obvious reasons (embarrassment), so my sisters and I had to learn on our own. My friends were sexually active before I was back in high school, so what I knew, I learned from them. I was highly active in church up until I turned 18, so everything in relation to the sanctification of the idea was already ingrained in my spirit. Though I was curious as to what the experience entailed, there was great hesitance towards partaking of what appeared to be the forbidden act. It wasn't until college that I decided to give up my virginity. The validity of my choice was based on the assumption that I'll be marrying my girlfriend at the time. All was fun until guilt became fruitful, spilling over into all parts of my life. We almost had a baby, but because we weren't practicing in the protective surroundings of marital bliss, everything crumbled. Our child was aborted and so was our relationship. That was just enough to cause me to back away and gather a more concise perspective on the matter. My responsibilities evolved... and so did I.
When you're watching porn (it's okay to admit that you do because it's a reality most of us are ashamed of confronting), you may feel a great sense of excitement with a soft, guilty undertone. We overshadow that with justification. You say, I'm not mimicking anything these people do or I don't personally promote human sex-trafficking, but by not saying no, you're saying yes. I struggle with this as well, for I have seasons when I have perfect restraint, but others when I fall hard and stay there for a while. Now that I'm getting married, this problem has the potential to leak into the life of my wife-to-be , my kids, and a third party (which is the last thing one wants to happen). Fellas, if you think hard about your sexual appetite, you really want to have sex with your wife because that encompasses everything you will ever want and need. She will be your euphoria , your box of ecstasy beautified for you alone. She will encourage your success when failures are plenty. She will walk with you into a furnace of social dislike, aware of your heart's true intent. She will mother your legacy, bringing them up in a way that reflects love's best nature. She will be everything she was made to be...for you.
So yes, I want to have sex with my wife. Not a girl in college who slips over occasionally and cares less about my spiritual, well-being. Not someone I meet at a club who's Instagram life is more appealing than the one she actually lives. No side-chick, no eye-candy. I want her. I want she, created for me so that we both can glorify God through our obedience. There's joy in living according to His will. This was available over ten years ago, but I wasn't ready to receive it, so I did things upon my own accord. This topic reminds me of my lactose intolerance. Drinking whole-milk and eating ice-cream from Cold Stone was a piece of cake for me...literally. Eventually, my body didn't have tolerance for it, so it struggled to digest it. Now days, I have to take lactose pills in order to enjoy a few spoons of Ben and Jerry's. The awareness of the consequences makes the difference because I'm acting accordantly. I can still indulge in the goodness of dairy products, but only under the supervision of a supplement that prevents disastrous side effects. Considering sex, I rather be protected by God's covenant than to run into a convenient store, looking for plan A (condom) and plan B (a pill).
One day, I'll be in a position to receive sex in it's entirety. There will be no worries towards unwanted pregnancies or carrying guilt around my neck everyday. I will be satisfied. My fiancé and I will continue to grow with each other, into each other, fusing hearts, souls, and bodies. This will be the best wedding gift of them all.
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